How do you write a touching and informative obituary?

Writing an obituary for someone you love is never an entirely routine task. You have to find the right words while your emotions are still running high—sometimes even before you’ve fully realized what has just happened.

And one question comes up often: What do you write in an obituary?

It isn’t necessary to recount an entire life. An obituary can simply announce the passing, provide useful information to loved ones, and, in a few heartfelt sentences, offer a glimpse of the person behind the name.

That’s the key: to provide clear information while paying a fitting tribute.

An obituary generally serves two purposes.

First, it serves to inform extended family, friends, former colleagues, and members of the community of the death. It can also include details about the viewing, funeral, memorial service, or a private celebration.

But a review is also a small space for memories.

A few lines can evoke a passion, a quality deeply associated with the person, their devotion to their family, or even their unique way of caring for others.

So it’s not just about announcing a death. It’s about gently beginning to share a memory.

Families and loved ones can also view the obituaries published by the Marie-Soleil Phaneuf Funeral Home to find information about memorial services and ceremonies.

Making this distinction can prevent a great deal of confusion.

When it comes time to write, one question often comes up: What should you include in an obituary so you don’t leave out anything important?

There is no one-size-fits-all approach. Each family can choose what information they wish to make public and tailor the text to their specific circumstances. That said, there are certain elements that generally help create an obituary that is comprehensive, clear, and helpful to loved ones:

• The full name of the deceased, including her maiden name, if applicable.
• Dates of birth and death, as well as the place of death if the family wishes to specify it.
• Place of residence, such as the city or neighborhood, especially when it helps people recognize the person.
• Family members and loved ones: spouse, children, grandchildren, parents, brothers and sisters, as well as any other people the family wishes to name.
• Details of the viewing and service: date, time, and location of the visitation, funeral, or memorial service. If the family prefers to keep this time private, this can simply be noted.
• Memorial donations, if desired. For example, the family may ask loved ones to make a donation to a foundation or organization that held special meaning for the deceased, particularly in lieu of flowers.

It’s also worth keeping one small precaution in mind: an obituary is public. Therefore, there’s no need to include every detail or provide personal information that doesn’t add anything to the tribute.
Once you’ve gathered this information, the hardest part sometimes begins: finding the few words that will help people recognize the person behind the dates and names. And that’s precisely where an obituary can become much more than just a simple announcement.

Instead of just listing dates and events, ask yourself:

What will people spontaneously remember about her?

Maybe it was the way he welcomed everyone to his table. His love of gardening. His endless card games. His laugh, which you could recognize anywhere. His Sundays spent at the cabin, or his knack for calling at just the right moment, just to see how you were doing.

These small details may sometimes seem trivial. Yet they are often what make a tribute truly heartfelt.

Instead of just writing:

“Michel was a generous man.”

One could write:

“Michel always had one more seat at his table and rarely found a good reason to let anyone leave empty-handed.”

You immediately get a better sense of who he was.

A job you love, volunteer work, music, fishing, travel, grandchildren, cooking, or simply the joy of bringing the family together…
Not everything has to be spectacular to be worth sharing.
It’s often the simplest things that bring back memories: a song, a recipe made every Christmas, a phrase that’s been repeated for as long as anyone can remember, a place where the family loved to gather.
A heartfelt obituary reflects the person it honors. That’s what matters.

There is no such thing as the perfect tone.

Some families prefer a simple, traditional text. Others want something warmer and more personal. A touch of humor can even be appropriate when it truly reflects the personality of the deceased.

Sincerity remains the best guide.

Reread the text and ask yourself a very simple question:

“Does that sound like him?”

Si la réponse est oui, vous êtes probablement sur la bonne voie.

A short quote, a phrase she often used, or a few meaningful words can also serve as a gentle conclusion to the tribute. However, it’s best to choose a personal quote or a short passage whose source you know.

A photograph often accompanies the first words that loved ones will read.
You don’t have to choose a formal photograph. A natural, bright image that truly captures the person’s essence can be much more evocative.
A familiar smile. A look that everyone recognizes.
Sometimes, that’s enough.
This same thoughtfulness can carry over into the ceremony. Photographs, meaningful music, a few mementos, or personalized commemorative itemscan help create a tribute that truly reflects the person who has passed away.
The idea isn’t to do more. Rather, it’s about choosing what matters most to your family.

In the days following a death, many decisions must be made quickly. As a result, it’s easy to make a mistake or overlook something.

Before publishing, take a few minutes to check the names, dates, spelling, and the time and location of the scheduled meetings.

Also, make sure that the people mentioned are comfortable with the information being made public.

It’s also best to avoid:

publishing too quickly without having important information proofread;

provide unnecessary personal details;

to feel compelled to follow a rigid model;

to try to tell the story of an entire life in just a few lines;

to be absolutely determined to find the “perfect” words.

A simple, heartfelt obituary is better than a complicated one that doesn’t reflect either the deceased or their family.

Sometimes a family knows exactly how it feels… but can’t quite put it into words.

That’s completely understandable.

At the Marie-Soleil Phaneuf Funeral Home, we can assist you in gathering the necessary information, finding respectful wording, and preparing an obituary that truly reflects the person you wish to honor.

You can come in with a few notes, scattered memories, a list of names—or simply tell us about the person.

We’ll take the time to work with you.

PBecause, deep down, a beautiful obituary doesn’t need to tell the whole story. Above all, it should allow those who knew this person to recognize them—even if only for a moment—between the lines.

“Because every life deserves a final tribute filled with tenderness and respect, we are here to support you.”